August 30, 2020

A few years ago, I wrote about Robert’s difficulties with learning those basic, little words that squeeze between other words connecting them to each other and to the space and time concepts that our brain tries to establish. I noticed then, that Robert grasped quickly the meaning of the word “reciprocal” but had difficulties with the word “instead”.  The matter of fact, I believe that it was during learning how to divide fractions, (telling him “multiply by reciprocal instead of dividing” and placing a reciprocal fraction and a multiplication sign on top of the division sign and the divisor) when Robert grasp the concept of “instead”.

Over the years we spent many hours practicing “on, off, under, below, next to, far, near, around, over, on the bottom, on the top, left, right, before, after, behind, in front” and many others. We practiced using many worksheets taken from books on following directions. We practiced during driving. “We are on the bridge”, “The canal is below“. We are under the bridge (I meant overpass). The red car is in front of us.  We pass the truck.  The track is behind us,”

We practiced while emptying a dishwasher. Although Robert knew where to put the silverware, plates. and cups, I, nonetheless, often and to his slight irritation, kept describing what he was doing. “Great, you put large plates on the top shelf.  You placed plastic containers on the bottom.” etc.

However, when  a couple of weeks ago, we returned to the easy (EASY?!) first pages from No-Glamour Following Direction, I realized that the little words remain the stumbling blocks on Robert’s path to more practical language. He had difficulties differentiating between, “Draw a circle on the picture” and “Draw a circle around the picture”. He had problems with “on” and “off” as they related to the pictures (He doesn’t have problems with turning something on or off.) He was unsure about top and bottom.  He hesitated with below and over.

And yet, despite his confusion in regards to those little words, he still  managed to complete thousands directions given to him over the years. He did that by using his brain and deciding what makes sense in a given environment and context .  I suspect that there is a part of his brain that does a lot of thinking WITHOUT language but through the vivid images of the world that surrounds him.

He has been learning language slowly, but for him it remains a second or a third mode of understanding,  He puts a lot of effort into learning. He learns for my benefit, for the benefits of people he loves, appreciates, and has contact with.  He learns it to better understand us.

He knows, and that often frustrates him a lot, that we are unable to learn from him.

I cannot see, what he sees.  I cannot understand what he knows. So, I have to teach him our ways of communicating, our language. This way he can try to translate his multidimensional pictures into linear trail of words.

August 29, 2020

Robert and I used to buy food in Stop and Shop Supermarket. We usually bought ten to twenty items and Robert ran them through the scanner at the self register. He used his ATM card to pay for the groceries. Scanning wasn’t a problem. He mastered that easily. However, he still needed encouragement to search for 4-5 number code on some of the vegetables or for a specific item among the pictures on the screens. He was getting slightly better using his alphabet skills to move the screens to the desired letters, but he still needed practice.  I do miss going to store with Robert and watching him learning to do cashier job.

I also miss Robert reminding me what we were supposed to buy. Before most of the trips to the grocery store, Robert made a shopping list. He put down a few things he considered important and let me add some other items.  However, I might forget the list, or there might be a product which we needed but not on the list.

There was time when Robert was adamant about NOT BUYING  food which was not on the list. Luckily, later, he understood that the lists are not perfect and needed to be supplemented by additional items. So, he not only let me buy something not previously written on the list, but he also placed in a shopping cart things which were not on the list, but were, nonetheless needed (like eggs).

Before COVID19 changed our shopping habits, Robert never wanted to buy things which we already had in the refrigerator. But when, starting in March, I tried to keep two week supply of food, Robert attitudes changed.

Maybe because he is not going shopping anymore, he puts more efforts into making  lists of needed products.  Moreover, he wants to have reserves of food.  He prepares the list usually in the late afternoon, knowing that I shop early in the morning during hours for people over 60.

One evening he made a list:

2 peach jello

2 strawberry jello

2 lemon jello

2 lime jello

2 eggplant

2 poblano (he meant two packets of poblano the way it has been sold in Walmart)

2 eggs (he corrected himself to write 12 when I asked him to choose between 2 and 12) Possibly, he meant 2 dozen, but I am not sure.

1 mozzarella cheese

2 Mexico ( Not sure if I understood, he brought me almost empty packet of shreded cheese and read “Four Cheese Mexican.

That was all.  Robert put the card on the kitchen table, took a bath, and went to bed.

We did too.

Around 2AM at night, extremely agitated Robert came into our bedroom screaming, “Ketchup. ketchup, ketchup, ketchup.”

It took me a while to understood the reason for his distress. Then I said, “OK, Write it on the list. ”

Robert calmed down, went to the kitchen, completed the list, and returned to his bed.

August 13, 2020

I cannot say that our days are difficult.  I cannot say that they are easy. They seem vague like out of focus pictures. Although they pass quickly, they seem not to move at all. We repeat the same activities every day. So, today seems like yesterday and the day before that.  Knowing that tomorrow will be like today, we don’t make any special arrangement for tomorrow.

Yes, we continue to study by following the simple and rigid pattern. However, we mostly review topics we dealt with before. No giant breakthroughs.  Not even slow accumulation of knowledge or skills. And yet, our hour or two of learning together became the cornerstone of our days. After breakfast (as late as it happens now) Robert joins me to solve a few math problems, practice pronunciation, read, and write a few sentences about his day.

A few times, we didn’t study in the morning. It happened  either because I was shopping or because one of us had a virtual doctor’s appointment. But if I thought that we could skip learning, Robert proved me wrong. It was not his love of learning but his OCD that precluded him from going to bed without an hour spent on completing  his worksheets.

The plan for desk ( well, dinner table) work is simple.

1. A few math problems – currently from Singapore Math 5th grade.  Today – rounding number to two decimal places.

2. Grammar and Punctuation. Today- using comas in letters.

3. Reading. A chapter from Pearson English Active Readers Anne of Green Gables.

4. A text in Functional Routines. Today-  how to make salad for dinner.

5. Pronunciation.  Today – words and phrases beginning with “sn”

Also: one Sudoku, two pages from Logic Links, and a few short texts to practice inference.

Robert concludes his study with coloring a page from, not very interesting coloring book.  He  hangs the picture on the refrigerator and gets ready for a walk. .