On Constant Worries and Sudden Gratifications

A few days of worries.  On Thursday, I picked Robert from school because he got sick.  Of course, he did not want to go home in the middle of the day as it was a clear break in the routine and thus reason for heightened anxiety.  So Robert protested.  He wanted me to go home and he wanted to go on a school bus.  Similar thing happened a year before at Bridge Center.  You could either convince him to go home or to wait with him for a bus.  Except when he is already agitated, convincing him is hardly possible.

He HAD to eat his lunch despite upset stomach. He had to fill his daily form – rigid ritual of copying names of activities completed that day  from the strips with pre-written short phrases.   The only original sentence was the one suggested to Robert by his aide. As  the last activity Robert wrote: I got sick. 

He slept most of the afternoon.  When he woke up in the evening, he started making noises.  Something I don’t remember him doing for a very long time.  I worried.  Was he not feeling well?  Was he anxious about something?  Was he telling me something or was he retreating into the world that was inaccessible to me?  Was that in any way a result of my screaming at him the previous evening?

He couldn’t sleep during the night, and continued to make noises.  I let him sleep long into Friday, not sending him to school.  When he woke up, he did not ask for school and seemed rather happy.  So we worked together on analogies, Venn Diagrams, and problems requiring logical application of language concepts. Every time  Robert place an element in one of the Venn’s sets  he had to tell either  an X is a Y or an X is not a Y. For instance, “A hummer is a tool” or  “A feather is not a tool.” He also had to tell in which way the words in analogy related to each other.

In the past, I found out  that the best approach to Robert making inarticulate sounds, was to tell him, “I noticed that you want to talk, so let’s talk.” After a few times of “talking” either by repeating separate sounds, the whole words, or short phrases, the frequency and the duration of vocalization decreased or disappeared completely.

What was different this time was that the sounds seemed to indicate either sadness, anger, or pain.

Nonetheless working together seemed to distract Robert  for a while.  Later, we went to the store, where he behaved very appropriately. The noises were gone.  He found all three ito look for bar code to scan each item.

The rest of afternoon Robert spent watching Netflix on his IPAD. From time to time, I heard his vocalizations and I worried.

On Saturday morning he was still making “sounds” .  I was not sure if he should go to his Saturday Program at Bridge Center.  But that was the last session this spring and he really wanted to go.  He was tense in the car.  When he made noises I asked him to repeat after me ten words.  He did. Then I turned on the music.  That seemed to relax him.

I forgot to mention that on all three of those days he asked for his dad, who went to New York on business trip and for his sister who had been in France since end of May. Was he making noise to express his longing for them?

He asked for them again.  He was happy when I reminded him that after Bridge Center we would go to New York to pick up dad and grandma.

Still, I was concerned leaving him at the program.  Four hours later I picked him up.  Claudia told me that Robert was using  whole phrases or short sentences to communicate. That was a new development.  Usually, Robert attempts to communicate by repeating quickly the same word many times. Only those who know him well, can recognize that word.  Sometimes.

It was rewarding to hear that.  I began to believe that the recent emphasis on language in our daily work somehow has started to pay off.   So on the way to New York, we did a lot of “talking” interspersed by listening to music and  to “traffic and weather together”.  After we came to his grandma’s apartment, Robert with his dad went for a walk along Hudson River.  He still was making noises, but somehow my insincere offer, “Let’s talk” calmed him immediately.

This morning he went for a walk in Central Park, then we drove back to Massachusetts.  On the way home, we did just a little, soft “talking”.  We did not want to bother other passengers.  Robert was busy with his IPAD, but let me use it to find a GPS position of our car when we decided to leave the highway.  (Dad was driving.) With fleeting interest, he  watched the picture of our car moving through the roads as seen from the satellite. Not bad for the first time.

When we got home, Robert, as always, unpacked our suitcases. He left clothes in the laundry room, placed medicines in the medicine cabinets, and carried toiletries to the bathroom.  He also folded laundry I had made before the trip.  I cooked dinner.  After we ate and I washed the dishes, I went to laundry room to turn on the washing machine.

There was no dirty laundry on the floor.  The dark clothes waited in the drier to be taken out.The lightly colored clothes  in the washing machine waited for their turn to dry.

In our home only two people do laundry.  Robert and I.  I did not do it.

He did!

I just don’t know who  taught him to separate light clothes  from dark?

And when?

Screaming at the Wrong Person

I was screaming at my son today.  He did not do anything wrong.  He just did not know the answer.  I was tired.  This is not an excuse; just the fact.  I did not want to study with Robert, but he kept asking, “Work, work, work.”  So I forced myself to work with him. As he kept making mistakes, I became mad at his school. I was mad at his teachers and the administrators.  But I screamed at Robert.  He tried to be calm, but he felt hurt.  He was hurt.

I was mad at his teacher, his speech therapist, the administration and the members of the school committee. I was mad at everybody.  I was mad at myself.  I don’t know of one thing my son learned this year at school.  I got so-called “progress reports” but couldn’t find any sign of progress.  I was mad at the situation I was not able to rectify. Still, I screamed at Robert.

I am a damaged human being.  I become a bad mother and a terrible  teacher.  Dealing with the school during last four years took its toll.

Now, I am the person, who hurts Robert by screaming at him.

I don’t know where to go from here.

I cannot teach my son if I scream at him.

Maybe,because of his OCD, he wants to keep the same pattern of the day and that includes learning with me.  Maybe he knows that if I won’t teach him, nobody else will.  Anyway, he insists on learning together.  I am afraid to continue our evening sessions.

I screamed at my son and I don’t know how to go past that.

I shorten this post today.  In the first version I vented my frustration and went overboard with my anger at school.  I was petrified by my screaming at Robert.  I considered removing that post entirely, but I decided to leave it here as an example of the damage caused by four years of incessant efforts to assure proper education.  I have to say, that the worst year was four years ago, and I still am not able to address it.  It also has to be said, that every year was a little better than the previous  one. The constant vigilance, however,  came at a price.  The price is that, for the last six months, I was not able  to have calm, professional contacts with school and that had to have a negative effect on Robert.

As of Today 6

We studied for only a short time.  One math page and a few pages of  exercises in logical thinking.

As for the math, Robert did two pages of the same type of exercises.  I chose that hoping that Robert would do that almost automatically and independently. I needed time to finish cooking. He made a 7 mistakes out of 50 problems. Not bad.  Moreover, those mistakes were caused by the problems I have already diagnosed but not addressed yet.  With whole numbers up to 100 and denominators up to 10, Robert doesn’t have any problems with finding a fraction of the number.  He quickly divides by denominators and multiplies by numerator.  But when the numbers get larger and the answers don’t present  themselves immediately, Robert hesitates and makes mistakes .  Only twice while solving those problems, Robert used long division and followed with multiplication.  Other times he divided twice.

I was surprised  that he couldn’t come with a quick answer to  division facts where  12 was either a divisor or a quotient.

Robert knows all multiplication facts involving 12 but is lost when he has to transform them into division facts.  All division facts up to 100, Robert learned  from using families of facts and changing a * b = c into c : b = a.  So why couldn’t he use, the fact he knew well   7 * 12=84 to solve   84 : 7 = ?

Probably, because we did not practice doing that at all.  Somehow we omitted dividing by 12, despite learning to multiply by it.

Today, we also continued solving  logical puzzles by placing pictures in order described by verbal cues.

I felt concerned that Robert had difficulties with following cues:

1. W is last.

2. X and Y are next to each other.

3. Z is between X and W.

The problem was with between.

When I placed Z, X, and W in front of Robert asking him to place Z between X and W,  Robert was confused.

I was sure he knew what it meant to place something between two other objects.  He has done it in the past.  Then I realized that there was a difference.  In the past he had to put  an object in the EMPTY space between two things that were already placed in unmovable places.  Now, he had to arrange all THREE objects: Z , X , and W in the same way.

He has never done that before.

I helped him.  I should not have.  I should have given him time to figure this on his own.  He can learn to think independently only if  he has a chance to think independently.  All too often, I am taking that chance from him by helping him all too soon.

There was a time when it was necessary to “help” before Robert made a mistake. Errorless teaching was  a powerful tool in creating basic concepts .  What I am writing here,however,  is entirely different.

It  is about trying, making mistakes, and trying to correct them INDEPENDENTLY. I don’t think you can learn to think without confronting errors independently.

When I was in seventh grade I was not very good in math.  In previous years, my brother often had helped me to solve those  word problems that required writing an equation or a set of two equations.   When he went to the University,  I was left with this horrid problem: At 3:00 the hands of a clock make right angles. What is the NEXT time the hands would make another right angle?

And no, the answer is not 9:00.

I spent three hours trying to solve this problem.  I cried.  I threw the book on the floor.  I gave up, I started again.  I drew the clock hundred times, I almost discovered calculus, before coming with a simple equation.

For the next 10 years, I did not have problems with math.  I went to study mathematics.  I did not have special talent, I certainly was not creative, but I knew that any problem in a textbook had a solution and thus I could find it.

This is why I want Robert to find a way to place three pictures in such a way that Z ends up between X and W.

To Teach or To Let Learn

It occurred to me, during our walk through the caves in the  Polar Caves Park in  New Hampshire, that long ago, I had made an assumption that Robert was not capable to learn on his own.  I assumed, without ever admitting it to myself , that  any new information or skill had to be forced, tricked, or infused into his brain by some form of teaching.

Although not once I noticed that Robert had learned many things through  observations, without any kind of instruction, I still acted as if Robert knew only that what he was taught.  This assumption probably motivates me to teach him any way I can and whenever and wherever I detect a learning  opportunity.

At least one hour of our three hours long trip to White Mountains we spent on practicing long vowels sounds.  Surprisingly, many native English speakers, and that includes many teachers, don’t realize that long “a”, “i” or “o” sounds are made of two different sounds,  Robert tends to neglect that second sound.   He also has a tendency to omit the ending consonants.  As we drove,  Robert was repeating after me  long words and short phrases as they related to what we saw outside.

MountaiN,  Speeeeeeed Limit, Streeeeeeet SiiiiiiigN,  GreeeeN grass, Whiiiiiite ClOUds,  motorcycle (with counting syllables).  We repeated these and other words many times.

Practicing in the car is easier than working at the dinning room table. The opportunities to escape are limited.  There is nothing else to do but look outside and “talk” about what we see.

When we walked up the stairs of Flume Gorge, I did not teach, as I was busy  climbing up and keeping the pace with Jan and Robert.  The teaching restarted during the walk down the path.  We differentiated between broad-leaf and conifer trees, we read names of the plants attached to bright orange ribbons.  My main effort, however, went toward teaching Robert the concept of the “middle”.

I have the fear of heights and of poison ivy.  On the left side of the path there was a ridge, on the right there were plants. At least one of them looked as if it could be a poison ivy.  Naturally, I wanted Robert to walk in the middle.  As basic as it seems, this is a concept Robert is not exactly understanding despite a lot of attempts on my part to familiarize him with it.

I asked Robert to stretch his arms from time to time  and keep as far from the left as he was from the right.    It seemed to work at least  as long as nobody else was on the trail to disturb the clarity of space.

After lunch we drove to Polar Caves Park.

I was too busy  protecting  my head from bumping into rocks and my  feet from slipping on the wet stones to teach Robert anything.  He did not need teaching.  He observed his dad and followed his lead.  Only once, when Robert climbed  down the metal ladder and reached the cave before his dad, he became anxious.  He made a noise of distress.  When Jan reclaimed the leadership position, Robert calmed down and bending down or moving to the side followed his dad through narrow and low passages.  Luckily they were rather short.

I walked behind Robert, and couldn’t help but wonder to what degree my “teaching” might  interfere with his “learning”.

At that moment, I also realized, that many times, as Robert “explored” new places on his own, I immediately interfered  afraid he would do something inappropriate.  Many times, I placed myself between Robert and “the world” playing the role of an interpreter as if Robert could not make sense of the world on his own.

While I more or less know what I have taught Robert, I don’t have any idea to what degree my constant presence  has hindered his ability to learn independently.

And that is a reason for concern.

Taking the Teaching Outside

Yesterday, Robert did not go to school.  The reasons why he missed the school are complicated and would need a long post to be presented clearly. For the sake of this post, they can be ignored.

He woke up around 9:30 pretty happy, ate something, dressed up, watched his IPAD while I was putting new tiles on the basement’s floor.  Before 11 AM I told him that we should go to the store, for a walk, and maybe McDonald.  He chose which of two supermarkets we would go to.  (Stop and Shop).  In the car, I repeated a short list of groceries to buy that included apples, milk, and Italian bread.  I told him he would pay using his card.  Twice a month he pays for groceries.  I followed him in the store. He went to the dairy section and stopped.  On two sides of the refrigerator’s door were two men cleaning the bottom shelves.  Robert hesitated and turned away from them.  I got the milk. He proceeded to the produce section and stopped  in front of boxes with apples.  I asked him to choose and  he chose, as always, Fuji.  He found bread.  He made sure it was just plain Italian not Italian with sesame seeds or anything else, and we approached the register.  He used his card, but forgot his new pin number, and I forgot it too.  Luckily, his card still work as a credit card  so he could pay.   Before I started the car, I asked Robert, “Where have we been?” He looked a little bewildered, so I pointed to the store.  Robert answered, “Stop and Shop”.

I asked, “Where do you want to go now, Stony Brook for a walk or McDonald?”  To my surprise, Robert chose walk.  It was a beautiful day.  Robert was happy and started running.  I stopped him and  told him to run to the bench and wait for me.  Somehow, this did not seem right, so instead he walked close by.

Many years ago, when Robert was 3, 4, or 5 during our frequent walks he learned to recognize oak, maple, and pine leaves.  Now, I wanted him to learn to discriminate among broad-leaf and conifer trees.  Just the day before, we were learning about those two kinds and the third – palm trees. As we walked I kept pointing to Robert one kind or the other.  He repeated after me.  No pressure.  No overdoing.  I couldn’t help myself and pointed to Robert white bark of a small birch tree.  Just to help him recognize the familiar tree by its name.  It was a few years ago during our camping trip to Vermont when Amanda, Robert’s sister, showed him how to pick up old bark to start a campfire.

I am not sure if the name, I reminded him of , helped him remember our camping trip and the time we spent in a lean-to next to a small pond in a park close to the Canadian border.  The nature of names is to connect past and present, far away places and spaces near us.  I am not sure if the names, I am pushing Robert to learn, play the same role for him.  But recognizing names is important, as it makes one  acquainted to the nature that surrounds him or her.

On a way to McDonald, I asked, “Where did we go?” I provided the answer:  Stop and Shop and Stony Brook.  I asked again.  Robert answered, but Stony and Stop  got mixed up, so I did not ask again.  Instead as we drove, I decided to practice something else.  When we were approaching a turn, I kept saying, “We will turn. We will turn”  While turning I was repeating quickly, ‘We are turning, we are turning, we are turning.”   After the turn I emphasized   “We HAVE TURNED”.  After a few turns and similar exercises, Robert considered it a game and with a laugh finished the last sentence himself.  WE HAVE TURNED!.

And so we did.

Planning the Future (Sort Of) Forgetting the Past.

For many years now, Robert has been planning the future.  Next day, to be precise. His plans are simple and expressed in his own concise manner:

“Bridge Center.  Wendy’s.  Dad” is Robert’s plan for  Saturday.  It means that he will attend the program at  The Bridge Center.  After the program, he will eat lunch at  Wendy’s Restaurant.   Dad would do the driving.

“School.  Poblano.  Four. ” This is the plan for Wednesday.  Robert expects that after school, he will have four poblano peppers for dinner. Sometimes to be exact he adds, “With cheese.”

Although succinct, the plans are repeated a few times  as Robert wants to be sure and reassured that he and I are on the same page and no changes are looming.

Planning for  the future, seems relatively easy for Robert.  Unfortunately, recalling the past, even the past that happened 5 minutes before, has been a challenge.

For a long time, I did not know how to help Robert answer the simplest questions, “What did you do today?” or even  “Where did you go today?”.

It has to be said, that although Robert could respond properly to many questions about pictures, answering questions that related to his own life was impossible for him.  It still is very hard and confusing.

A couple of years ago, I started teaching Robert to answer just one question, “Where did you go?”

We did our lessons in the car.  One Saturday, as I was driving Robert from his Bridges to Independence Program, I asked, “Where have you been?”  and immediately provided him with an answer, (technique from Verbal Behavior), “Bridge Center”.  I repeated the question and waited for Robert to answer, “Bridge Center”.  Which he did.  Over and over until we got to the gas station.  After I filled the tank, but before we left the station, I asked again, “Where have you been?”, and fed him with an answer, “Bridge Center, Gas Station.”  I was not driving yet, so I used my fingers to count the places.  One finger for The Bridge Center, two fingers for a gas station.  I repeated this cycle until Robert listed both places himself.  I did not pay attention to the clarity of his pronunciation.

We kept repeating the question and the answer until we got to Wendy’s Restaurant.  In the restaurant, I asked a few times, “Where have you been?” and Robert answered sometimes with prompt, sometimes independently.  I also asked, “Where are we now?” That response came quickly and easily, “Wendy’s”.

As soon as we got in the car, still in parking lot, we repeated the extended list of places with the help of three fingers this time.

My line:  “Where have you been? Bridge Center, gas station, Wendy’s. Where have you been?”

Robert’s line: “Bridge Center, gas station, Wendy’s”

Over and over, until Robert could answer just after, “Where have you been?”

We practiced a little on the way home, but not too much, as he became a little annoyed and asked for music.

At home, Robert with my help wrote a journal entry.  Today is Saturday.  I went to Bridge Center, gas station, and Wendy’s.” 

In the evening we expanded this entry to.  Today is Saturday.  I went to Bridge Center to cook and meet friends.  I went to gas station to get gas for the car.  I went to Wendy’s for fries.

Recalling what he was doing in these places was easy, except for The Bridge Center.  When Robert does too many thing in one place, somehow that becomes harder to  remember or to choose from.  Getting gas at the gas station is as obvious as getting fries at Wendy’s”.

It is a good technique, while applying this approach to teaching recalling the past  ( places and activities connected to them), to opt for a similar design.  Two (or one) places connected to activities that are easy to name and one that is a little harder.

I think, this approach to teaching about things that happened in the past (even in the previous hour) has been working.  Unfortunately, I practiced this skill only on Saturdays.  That is not enough to make a difference.

Who Is Learning?

My son is learning. He is learning slowly, but he does learn.   I am learning too.  I am learning who Robert is and  how to teach him.  I am learning in a slower pace  than Robert does, but I do learn.

My son’s educators from his public school don’t learn.

Year after year, they don’t learn.

They came to the position of my son’s teachers without proper preparation.  They don’t know my son.  They don’t know what my son knows.  They don’t know what he doesn’t know. They don’t even know how to find out what he knows or he doesn’t know.

They neglect my son with the consent of the school administrators.

Today I received the progress report written by his teacher.

From this progress I deduced two things:

1.  That my son cannot learn anything in this classroom. He looses what he learned before.

2.That his teachers cannot teach him, because they don’t know who he is or how to teach him.

It is all my fault. Every year, for three out of four last years I fought for my son’s right to education.

I fought to remove him from the teacher who was placing Robert in a separate desk with a packets of word searches puzzles. Day after day.  She refused to teach him.  She caused him to be in constant distress.  She was, willingly or not, destroying him.

Another year I fought for my son’s right to free and appropriate education.  Any education.  I tried to force the teacher to teach my son.  I fought with the teacher and very influential teacher’s aide.  They considered teaching to be illegal in this classroom.

Each of those years, my son lost six months of the  school year.  But I won for him at least three months of decent  teaching.

Each year, I ended up exhausted.  I couldn’t make up for the lost time.  My health was deteriorating.

This year, I gave up the fight in December.  I couldn’t force the school to teach my son.  I gave up and my son lost the whole year. Because of me.

It was too hard.  Just too hard.  I couldn’t cut  through the web of lies.  I couldn’t change anything. Even if I won concessions from school in regards to IEP, the IEP was not followed . The school is  unaccountable for my son’s progress. I fought before.  I tried to get help from the principal, special ed director, superintendent, school committee, SEPAC, Program Quality Assurance at Department of Education, Commissionaire Chester, Hearing Officers from BSEA.  The best I got was the three months of a relatively decent teaching out of the whole school year . The price was exhaustion, prolonged stress and deteriorating health.

It is almost the end of the school year.    Trying to preserve myself I abandoned my son.  I couldn’t negotiate anymore with the Public School District. I have a Stockholm Syndrome already.  Even a thought  of attending a meeting with the school turns my stomach upside down. I cannot face concentrated manipulations, which look like a prearranged conspiracy to defraud my son of education. I don’t know how to defend my son. I am humiliated by other people’s lack of knowledge.   I am offended  as a person with disability, as a mother of a powerless boy, as a former teacher, and as a  human being.  I am hysterical.  I gave up and my son lost the whole year.

For those who look at this pages to get some suggestions about teaching, I do apologize for this emotional outburst.  But this is a part (a missing part) of Robert’s education and life. Thus it should not be censored.

On Language and Logic

For a few last afternoons, Robert was pasting pictures in  the order determined  by the three sentences printed above the four empty rectangles.

We worked on problems presented on pages of a thin workbook Cut, Paste, & Color. Logic, Grade Level 1-2 by Remedia Publication.

X is first.

Y is not the last.

W is behind Z.

It was not our first attempt to do so.  Using copies of the pages from that book, we worked on those tasks a few  times in the previous  three or four years.   We had to work together as Robert needed a lot of support and was not able to complete the tasks  independently.

The reason was that Robert had problems with understanding negation. After reading, ” Gorilla is not the oldest.” he, not surprisingly,  placed the picture of the ape above the word “oldest”. To remedy that, we returned to the old set of cards from Super Duper School Company.  Despite Robert becoming very good in understanding negation in this context (cards), whenever we returned to the Logic workbook, the errors resurfaced. Consequently, we brought back the cards, returned to the workbook , practiced with cards, and ….gave up.

For the last few days, I have been trying a different approach.  Simpler one and more… logical.  After reading, for instance, the sentence, “Gorilla is not the oldest” I ask Robert to write, “No gorilla.”  in the space above the word “oldest”.  I think, it would work better.

The error I made during the  previous teaching attempts, was caused by not addressing the problem in the context of the activity, but practicing it in different setting (with cards). Nothing wrong with the cards as long as they are used as a SUPPORT of the main activity.  When used separately, they become a goal in itself and do not apply to anything else.  I made a mistake of not using Robert’s ability to understand (?) negation in one context to solve more complex problems  in a different setting. Consequently, Robert did not recognize a new problem as a variation of the old one.

Lack of a full understanding of this language concept -negation-  resulted in failing to complete exercises in logical thinking.

Negation, unfortunately, is not the only concept Robert has not grasped yet.  Many “simple” words still manage to confuse Robert.  While he understands “north,south, or southwest”, he still has difficulties with “top and bottom. ”

That might suggest that Robert  understands the idea of “top and bottom”  (when presented as “north and south”) but doesn’t understand the language concepts as the names for those ideas.

 

 

 

 

On Pictures and on Words

Many children with autism go through programs of matching pictures.  They might match identical photographs or the different photographs of the same concept (for instance pictures of different chairs).  They can match objects by the categories to which they belong.  They can match part to the whole thing.  They can match by the same color, shape , or … function.  Matching, as simple  as it seems, is the  great introduction to complex language concepts even for those who seem not to have language.

Robert did a lot of matching in his first years of ABA at the private school.  He also did a lot of matching with me, although in a different format.  I used many toddler level workbooks to provide opportunity for more “natural” matching by connecting pictures by lines or by placing stickers in proper places.  Although Robert completed each of the book twice or three times (Yes, I bought a few copies of each workbook), working on those simple exercises allowed Robert to flexibly move from one kind of matching to another.  On one page he matched body parts of different animals to the animals, on the other he matched animals to their habitats, and so on.

A few years later, I introduced Robert to simple (?) verbal analogies.  Although by that time, he could already read, those analogies were much harder for him to complete than matching pictures. Since picture matching is also a form of analogy, I had difficulties understanding what was a nature of this problem and thus how to address it.  Luckily, I found. through Remedia Publication, a  workbook in which one part of the analogy was presented as a picture and another one as a word.  For instance, Robert had to glue  pictures of a bird, a whale, and a bear in rectangles with words: ocean,  nest, or forest.

I think that this phase helped Robert with understanding of the analogies expressed by words only.

A few days ago, I returned to the same workbook.  I wanted Robert to do something very easy and almost mechanical. Just to make him feel good about his abilities. Oh well, as soon as I observed Robert  completing his tasks without any hesitation, I changed my mind.  I did not want to be mean.

I simply discovered another learning/teaching opportunity and the skill I neglected to practice in this environment: talking.

Because the words do not come easy to Robert, in the past we used them only in a very limited way.  It is not that I was silent through the activity.  I did comment, I think.  I also elicited a few singular words from Robert.

This time, as Robert was placing pictures in proper spaces, he had to say an almost (almost!) complete sentence, ” A fin is a part of a fish.” or

“A beak is a part of a bird.”  Four sentences of similar structure.  If he missed an article, I did not ask for correction.  I repeated after him without an error.  (I think.) If he missed any other word, he was encouraged to repeat.

I wanted Robert to practice talking in sentences, but I also wanted Robert to understand the nature of analogy by describing it with a word. Thus, in this case,  the emphasis on “IS A  PART”  of each sentence.

In other exercises the emphasis was on “IS THE OPPOSITE OFF”   (Happy is the OPPOSITE of sad. Back is the OPPOSITE  of front.  ) or “LIVES IN”  (A whale LIVES in the ocean. A boy LIVES in the house.

As I am working with Robert, I  am often not exactly sure what I am teaching and what I am missing.  That is why I am returning to the same exercises we have completed in the past, because at different times they offer  opportunities to learn something entirely different.

In the past, Robert learned that words represent objects (or the concepts).  He learned that those concepts are in different relations with each other.  Now he was learning words representing RELATIONS  between words… and/ or objects.

Finding a Piece of a Puzzle

I don’t mean THE PIECE that is the ultimate solution to the problem.  I mean “a piece” that fills some minor void without claiming the right to answering all the questions or even to completing the picture. 

For a very long time, Robert was able to answer only very simple questions and not capable of asking any.

The questions had to be concrete and relate to  visible  objects or their pictures. “What is it?”, “What color is it?” Or  later,”Where are they? ” “What are they doing?” He was unable to answer reliably any question about himself.  He also could not answer any question as it related to the simple sentence, he had just read.

I was baffled by that fact and felt powerless.   Today, I believe that Robert didn’t have an idea of the “question”.  Fifteen or twelve years ago, I was not aware of that fact.   Yet  unknowingly, I  introduced the concept of the question to Robert. I did that with the help of an old Schaffer’s Publisher workbook for kindergarten or first grade level reading.  I don’t have this workbook anymore.  I tried without success to find it on multiple websites. I don’t even remember its title.

To make up for this lack of concrete information, I will try to recreate its method of developing the idea of question as I remember it.

On the right side of each page, there was a small picture.  On the left side, there were three very simple and short sentences printed in large letters.  Below the text, there the same sentences were written.  Each sentence was copied twice or even three times.  Each copy  had one empty space replacing one of the words.

For instance:

The cat sleeps under a chair.

The ……………sleeps under a chair.

The cat sleeps ………………..a chair.

The cat …………………..under a chair.

At first, I wanted to skip this part of the workbook and move to the part where “WH” questions were asked.  I noticed, however, that Robert had difficulties even with those simplest (?) of tasks.  I concluded, that the practice was in order to help Robert better attend to the text.  So we did work on filling voids in the sentences before moving to questions in the next part of the same workbook.

It did not occur to me then, that by writing missing words, Robert was learning the concepts of questions and answers much more precisely than when he was answering the questions I described in the first part of this post, in the context of a concrete picture.

The question is nothing more than a  the missing information, thus missing word.  To  answer is to  provide that information and thus to fill the void.

With the support  of a Schaffer’s workbook (I doubt if it has been reissued during the rule of Common Core Standards) I helped Robert understand the concept of the “question”  and place a small piece of the puzzle in the right place.

I did not realize that ten or twelve years ago.  For me, those were  only exercises in paying attention.  Had I understood this mechanism better, maybe I could teach better.  But then, maybe not.